Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Leaps and Bounds

That is the theme for the day.

Lent is here. Yay!
I am looking it in the eye, taking its shoes off, and asking it to penetrate me for 46 days.
Rock and Roll Cowboy.

I am really excited. I cant explain it. Dont ask. I cant put it into words.
BC I would,
if I could,
but I cant.

I would draw you a sweet picture to show off to your friends. You could be intrigued by all of its madness. I think maybe Im the one intrigued.

Actually, I am deeply enamored by the thought of how glorious my life feels.
I have always been shy. ( can it, once again, APW )
Shy to the point of such fear that I have been unable to face real things happening.
To me!!!!
Maybe shy isnt the appropriate word.
Repressed? No, I mean, yeah, scared???

Pushin' em down, sweepin' em under the carpet, squeezed between Oprah and her white elephant.

Somehow theres hope in everything.
Somehow, I have been given the vision to see past the junk and focus on the amazing!!!

More than positive it has to do with my prayer life. God always seems to shed light on what I need to pray for.
And, I ask.
Always pray for yourself. God loves that part of you.
The humble.
The scared.
The willing.

Of course, pray for others, but thats the point of having a personal relationship with Christ.
Its personal.
Its face to face. And He gets me.
Every nook and cranny. Always encouraging me to push harder.

Heres a gem.
This past Christmas, I was a nervous, anxious, angry, contentious, mess.
I despised the thought of decorations, presents, family time. It made me cry furiously when I was so jealous of my beautiful friends and their sweet families.
It wasnt hidden.
Everyone knew.
Walking on eggshells around me.
Like a ticking little time bomb.

Hateful. Pissed. So very sad.

Landa had asked me to go Christmas decoration shopping with her for her church.
She knew it was the last thing I could endure.
A wonderful church friend of hers, Allyson, was coming along also.
Who is one of the most incredible women I have ever met.
We went.
I pouted.
I even cried a little.

We HAD to stop for ice cream, and I HAD to have coffee, but in the middle of all my self pity, Allyson told me a story.

She told me about a gentleman in her Sunday School class. Allyson told me that they had a lesson on being a servant of God.
A willing servant.
This fella had stated, he wanted to do Gods will in his life, but was afraid to ask what it is.
He said, what if God calls me to be a missionary in Africa?
( my first thought was, that would be incredible.)
Allyson was so disappointed.
I can see that Mr. Fella does not have his whole faith in Christ.
(partially invested)
Allyson made it so clear.
She stated that God will prepare your heart to do His will.
I love that.
I love that God has been preparing me, is preparing me, for whatever may happen.
If God did call me to do something of that magnitude, He would not put it in my heart to start with.
I will serve God with a pure heart.

It turns out, this past Christmas was wonderful. God granted me peace, even when I was stubborn, little donkey.

I have to point something out. I am stupid when it comes to typing. Its really a modern miracle that I type as much as I do.

I ALWAYS misspell relationship.

Every time.

I seem to spell it REALATIONSHIP.

Somehow, I think thats a little more fitting.
Maybe from now on, I wont correct it. Leave it how it is.

That makes my little heart beat fast. In a happy way.

Long story short, trust in God. Love everyone.
Even the stinkers that try to fool with your path.

That, brothers and sisters, makes you exceptional.

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